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L.O.V.E. Written by Trilby Johnson

An article for the Missing Piece by

Trilby Johnson, Author, Speaker and Body Energy Alchemist.

 

There is so much written on and about love – in books, songs, films, poetry. We humans seem fascinated and captivated by it, with many of us striving to have more of it in our lives. I know for a long-time I felt it was something ‘out there’ that I needed to acquire, earn and deserve as a kind of measure of my own self-worth and purpose. Yet, it seemed to elude me – in my own sense of love and my external relationships – although there was always a tiny flicker of it somewhere deep within me.

I experienced and observed how deprivation of this emotion formed behaviour patterns of frustration and pain. If love is really all we need, then surely more people would want this in their lives and there would be more of it visible in our lives, right? Yet, even from a young age, when I looked around me, I saw more struggle and suffering than I did Love and I knew that this simply wasn’t the whole truth of things. Consequently, I set out to discover and explore this mystery of love for myself, so that it was no longer merely an emotion and rather a state of unconditional being. Here is what I discovered …

 

‘L’ is for Letting Go

To uncover the true essence and experience of what love could be, it was necessary to look beyond the current definition of love. In my opinion, love with a capital L is something much larger and more subtle than the socialized version presented today, or the highly dramatize notions of romance put forward today and it goes much deeper than finding one’s soul mate in order to feel complete.

For many, the emotion of love goes beyond words in its intensity. Is this not an invitation in itself to go beyond the common definition of what it is or isn’t? Is this not the invitation of the unconditional, that the essence of this LOVE emotion is calling us to and through?

Have heard the saying, “If you love something let it go. If it comes back to you, it’s yours.” What if this was an invitation to let go of everything you think love is or has been or want it to be and be open to the experience of life itself, rather than the limiting definition of the search for a mate, partner or marriage? Free your mind and the love will follow. Letting go of what love should be and look like, allow you to experience something organically life-changing.

‘O’ is for Options

Whose definition of love are you adhering and conforming to?

How unconditional in this love and how is it working for you?

I don’t know about you, but for many years of my life I tried to condition my life to fit into other’s  version of what love was. A few were uplifting and expansive, whilst many left me feeling unhappy,  unloved and unlovable for a long time. I found freedom in the unconditional nature of which may spoke, although I didn’t experience or see much of it around me. So I decided break the mould and love on my own terms. I began to look for different options of what love could be.

The biggest and most impactful option I chose, was to love myself unconditionally. It’s my purpose and a continuous labour of love.

 

‘V’ is for Vulnerability

It’s often said in mindset and spiritual circles that there are only two options – love or fear. Is this true? And no there is no right or wrong answer. Only what each of us chooses to believe and experience so that we continue to grow. This requires vulnerability.

To be totally and comfortably uncomfortable with being vulnerable requires acknowledging your ability to respond (responsability) and being frankly honesty with yourself. While it is certainly a delicious blessing to feel loved by another, a true foundation of unconditional love lies within. It means having the courage to experience fear, hurt, loss, sadness as well as the joy, love and companionship of all our relationships. However, for each to reach their full potential unconditionally, there can be no judgement. Judgement is not unconditional and creates duality. This makes being vulnerable challenging as it seems there is always only two choices. Love or fear. Right or Wrong. Good or Bad. Vulnerable or Closed.

Vulnerability is an openness of body, mind and spirit that allows the unconditional to be experienced in all its options and beyond words. It’s the invitation to be open and to let love in and through. It is when we restrict ourselves that we experience hurt as painful.

 

‘E’ is for Expansion

In much of what is defined as love today, in my opinion, feels restrictive and I simply choose not to believe in this version. Instead, I feel love is expansive and an invitation to be and explore so much more. Expansion doesn’t necessarily refer to size here, but rather an experience of growth and joy and peace.

The universe is shown to be made up of energy – vibrations of atoms – that come together to create and give form. It is continually expanding into moreness! Could this be love? You decide.

As someone who had felt the lack of love for many years of my life, I see LOVE as an expansive force that is inevitably pushing us all forward. The type of journey we have is up to us. I have come to observe LOVE as one of humanity’s beautiful creations and one that will lead us into the depths and to the heights of who we are and can be.  There is no need to find it because we are already in it. Life and others are simple reflecting the depths and nuances back to us on the way.

I am on fire with LOVE for all that is.

Here’s love to you too,

Trilby xx

 

p.s. My book ‘FEARLESSLY ALONE – Stop the Lonely Crisis and Find Your Happy’ is partly my story of how I found Love with a capital L and how emotions are having an impact on our physical health and why. To have a greater sense of love, self and peace in your life, order your copy online or via your local bookshop now -> http://www.trilbyjohnsontheconnective.com/books


Trilby Johnson is an Author, Speaker and Body Energy Alchemist. She specializes in supporting individuals to resolve their physical, mental, emotional and spiritual trauma and pain and create a new genuine sense of self, health, peace and joy.

She is the founder of her own successful business Trilby Johnson – The Connective and through her work and writing supports her clients in attaining their next level of expertise, with her gentle yet effective methods that she has gained from over 25 years of experience in Behavioural Psychology and the healing arts.

Trilby is a successful Author of two books: ‘Fearlessly Alone: Stop the Lonely Crisis and Find Your Happy’ and her collection of original quotes ‘A-Ha Moments: Inspirational Quotes To Shift Your Thinking

She has a degree in Psychology and is certified in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), Reiki, DNA Activation, Meta-Coaching, Holistic Massage and Advanced Healing Processes. Trilby seeks to continually transform her own life and uses all her tools personally.

Her days are spent following her joys: writing, travelling, guest speaking, reading, star gazing, enjoying her organic garden and country lifestyle.

To get in touch with Trilby go to:

Website : http://www.trilbyjohnsontheconnective.com
Email: info@trilbyjohnsontheconnective.com

 

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Love is More Than a Bouquet of Roses – Written By Wendy Hutchinson

Love is More Than a Bouquet of Roses

Written By Wendy Hutchinson

 

My oldest son rides motorcycles and has lived life full throttle from the moment he entered the world.  He was trying to beat a red light and an SUV jumped the green light and the damage was extensive.  I was out walking my dog that morning and a stranger called from his phone and asked me “do you have a son”?  I said “yes”, “does he ride a motorcycle”? I said “yes”.  My stomach started to twist into a knot and I knew this was not going to be good news.  He says “I just saw him T bone a car and he is lying in the middle of the street unconscious, I’m not sure if he’s alive, he’s at the intersection of Chimney Rock and 59.  Paramedics are on the scene.  Click.  I started running home dragging my dog.  I’m crying and starting to get hysterical and start bargaining with God, “don’t take him, I’m not ready, don’t call him home yet”!  I get in the house and start running up the 3 flights of stairs calling my husband’s name.  He was just getting out of the shower and I am crying uncontrollably “he’s dead! He’s dead! OMG he’s dead” I’m inconsolable.   My husband is just standing there in shock holding me and I tell him there has been an accident and my son was hit by an SUV and I just know he is dead or dying in the ambulance. I started gathering things for the hospital, dealing with my dogs and as I’m getting the downstairs set up for our old dog and the other one to doggie daycare, I’m begging God not to let my son die.  I wasn’t ready to lose him. Are we ever ready to lose the ones we love?  We started calling hospitals.   We found out where he was when a police officer called with the information, how he got my number I don’t know.  At this time, all I knew was he was alive and we raced to the ER.  In that moment, I knew what the depth of love is.

Love isn’t romance.  It isn’t sunsets and walks on the beach. Love is your soul connecting so deeply to another soul that pieces of you die when they die.  Love is the imprint two souls have on each other that say Namaste, the light in me honors the light in you.   Pure love is unconditional.  It doesn’t keep score.  It is being compassionate and forgiving and seeing beyond the pain the other is causing you.  Above all, love is choosing to be complete and whole so you can show up in a healthy way, set boundaries, create harmony but not codependency. Love honors you while holding space for the other.

Love is infinite in its depth and flows like a river between us all. It is a connection beyond words or space or time.  It is unbreakable although sometimes we feel broken.   Choosing Love over fear creates miracles and healing.  Although love varies from parent to child, or between you and your pet or between you and your spouse or friends and family, the one truth about love is it is eternal.  Choosing Love over fear allows you to show up as the highest version of yourself.

Fear was showing up for me in the ICU waiting room. The running tape of what if scenarios began immediately.  What if he is brain dead, what if he is paralyzed, what if he will require 24/7 care for the rest of his life? What does that look like for us?  I was just stepping fully onto my path as a Life Coach and Marconics energy practitioner, would I have to sacrifice my dreams to now care for my injured son for the rest of his life?  His girlfriend was hyperventilating on the waiting room floor, I’m comforting her, while my husband was sitting stoically dealing with his internal dialogue and emotions, taking it like a man.  Fear energy takes you right down into the abyss with no chance of clawing your way out.   Fear keeps you isolated and scared and it creates an imbalance in your entire being.  When we are in fear we want to lash out, be angry, stressed, anxious and no good outcomes ever come from that mental state.

So here we were in the ICU, I’m alone with him in his room, mother and son.  He has broken his jaw in 3 places, broken pelvis (cracked in half like and egg), broken wrist in 4 places, broken arm in 3 places and small skull fracture.  He was in agony and sweating from the pain.  I heard him breathing, I felt him suffering.  He had 3 surgeries in 4 days.  I was thankful he was still alive.  Love is intangible, yet I felt the depth of the love energy pouring over me from friends and family and I opened myself to receive it. This was an extremely hard situation as he couldn’t stand and was bed ridden for a minimum of 6 weeks, his was jaw wired shut so it was a strictly liquid diet. They discharged him from the hospital exactly 1 week after the accident.

One night my son was in so much pain nothing we could do was giving him any relief. All I could do was crawl into bed next to him and hold his hand, and just be there holding space for him as he took the pain. We laid there all night waiting for time to pass for next dose of pain meds.  It was in that moment, that I knew a love so deep for my son it created a reservoir of strength that allowed me to walk through the suffering. This was one of the hardest things I have ever faced. Love is not a bouquet of roses.  It is the full expansion of your heart reaching out and touching the heart of another.

Aloha,

Wendy xx


About Wendy Hutchinson:

Alinea Life Coaching

www.alinealifecoaching.com

TEL: 619-246-5948

6 Ways Gratitude can Change your Life – Written by Ellen Rich

By Ellen Rich, Holistic Life Coach and Founder

www.act2.expert

 

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.”

~ Melody Beattie[1]

 

#1.  Gratitude is something many of us don’t really understand

When I first ran across the concept of gratitude, it wasn’t clear to me. Did it mean saying thank-you, was it a religious notion or did it connote paying it forward?  Is there something special about gratitude; is being grateful synonymous to being a good person or is it something we feel only when pressed?  It seemed obtuse and I never was able to use it as a word or feel it within my body.

As I think back over my life, one situation where I felt gratitude in my heart and throughout my body was after my mother passed away.  We had become very close in the years I was her caregiver. Our sharing as mother and daughter shifted, as we became close friends and changed roles.

Devastated at her passing, I wailed and cried.  After the 2- year mark passed, I started remembering things that she had done for me my entire life.  She birthed me, protected me, encouraged me, and stood by me in several grueling situations.  I now carry her in my heart and she is with me 24/7- always there to give me guidance.  This is how I define gratitude.

 

#2.  An unclear focus can be shifted with gratitude

We all experience uncomfortable to extremely painful situations.  Just the other day I had someone get upset with me because I hit the wrong emoji button (thumbs down) in a text message and couldn’t correct it.  Feedback from others told me this was devastating for this person.  I had no idea and said I was sorry.  Too late, the damage was done.

I was miffed and got progressively upset as I thought about what had happened.  There was really nothing I could do.  And that was my “ticket” to gratitude.  Several feelings arose that I could feel in my heart including my need to be liked and that maybe there was a better way to spend my time.  As I sat with this, I began to feel gratitude and my anger dissipated. I was grateful as now I had time to do another project that meant more to me.

 

#3.  Gratitude can impact the quality of your life

The impact can include emotions, physical condition and aging, support systems, and mental capabilities. There may be parts you have denied or hidden away. To be a complete person with the best quality of life, total integration of your being will help during the rough patches.

Gratitude is more than material wealth or the perfect body. These will not improve the quality of your life.  Gratitude is something that shifts your entire life.  Sometimes because you have selflessly helped someone and received incomparable joy, you begin to recognize gratitude in your life.

We listen to the people on TV that have weathered the hurricanes and property devastation this year.  They say that by helping another they feel better and are very grateful despite their personal problems. It’s the only thing they can possibly do.  They see no other choice.

Recently, there was a massive killing of 58 (as of this writing) by one gunman. Over 500 were injured. With no one in charge, everyone was on their own.  But something magical happens within disasters.  People put their lives aside to aid victims, cover bodies to save someone else and take a bullet and run right into fire to give people time to escape.  All involved seemed grateful for helping a fellow human being.

 

#4.  Gratitude can improve your happiness factor

“Two psychologists, Dr. Robert A. Emmons from the University of California, and Dr. Michael E. McCullough from the University of Miami, have committed much of their research careers to studying the effects of gratitude.

“In one such study, the researchers asked a group of people to write a few sentences every week about a particular topic. One group was instructed to write about things that didn’t make them happy. Another was instructed to write about things that they were grateful for. And the control group was instructed to write about things that had occurred but with no focus towards being positive or negative.

The results? The group that was instructed to write about things that they were grateful for was far happier and optimistic about their lives than the group that had focused on things that had occurred in a negative light. When we’re grateful for things, it’s a natural occurrence to be happier about life. You realize the things you have rather than the things you don’t.”[1]

#5.  How gratitude can lighten or reduce your inner most fears

We all have fears, but often we live with or suppress them until they “pop out” again.  Fear comes at us when we feel out of control.  We dwell on the past and get depressed or project into the future and feel anxious. Most people don’t fix these feelings. The mother who picks the car up for a trapped child, the underage girl who pursues her rapist, and the gang banger who leaves his street tribe; love or fear, is their motivation and this can result in gratitude.

 

#6.  Faith? Religion? Spirituality?

According to several online sources (Google search) there are around 4,500 religions in the world. This does not include the off shoots or others that aren’t mainstream.  With time and changing needs this number varies.

Everyone on the planet has a slightly different definition of their faith, religion, spirituality or none. Can nothing have a defination in the grand scheme of things gratitude can transform your life by linking you to something greater than to yourself (ego).

“We’re born alone, we live alone, and we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we’re not alone.”[2]

Orson Welles[3]

Links:

[1] http://www.psy.miami.edu/faculty/mmccullough/gratitude/Emmons_McCullough_2003_JPSP.pdf

[2] http://www.psy.miami.edu/faculty/mmccullough/gratitude/Emmons_McCullough_2003_JPSP.pdf

[3] https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/o/orsonwelle142014.html

Thank you for reading,

Ellen  Rich


After working in the corporate world for 30+ years, Ellen started a Holistic Life Coaching program.  Called act2.expert (www.act2.expert), it is a Holistic Life Coaching Program that allows the client drive the process in a safe and comfortable environment.  Ellen has a BA, MBA, many certificates and has attended Wisdom of the Whole Coaching Academy.

 

 

The Beliefs and Affirmations that make us who we are by Trilby Johnson

The Beliefs and Affirmations that make us who we are

Written by Trilby Johnson

Our beliefs are the building blocks of our identity. As they stack together one after the other, throughout childhood and later life, they create the tapestry of our personalities and from this, the identity that we cultivate begins to take shape and form. We become what we believe, both consciously and unconsciously. On one level, this may offer insight into who we are and how we live life.  Nevertheless, very often, on a more personal and individual level, the beliefs we hold may leave us feeling a fraud or unfulfilled and very confused, with the desire to explore and experience more…

This happens when the beliefs we have been taught and are holding onto, are not our own and rather a product of socialization and indoctrination. When a belief is a good one, it can be very good and lead to positive experiences. When a belief is a bad one, it can be very bad and lead to limiting or disempowering experiences. It’s important to be aware that not all beliefs are created equal!

Many people consider that a belief is the same as the truth. A belief and what is true, are not necessarily the same thing, however a belief will certainly influence the type of experiences we have as individuals. If we think of a belief systems as a type of filter, this becomes easier to understand. In particular on a cognitive level, this distinction is important to highlight – beliefs are forms of habitual thinking that build and trigger strong neural responses.

This is one reason, that a strong belief may be difficult to challenge or change, as it is deeply embedded into a person’s behavioural patterns. Not to mention the fact that most of us have several predominant beliefs that are running the show.

In addition to this, a belief rarely stands alone and is joined with one or several other beliefs – known as associations – that weave together to create a web of belief systems. For example, if we have the belief that money is the root of all evil, this will activate a multitude of beliefs around money and what kinds of behaviours are considered good and evil. This comparative process is often subconscious and yet very powerful, which can leave many of us feeling torn in two when it comes to making choices in our daily lives and living up to our beliefs. Conflict usually arises however, when we are confronted by two or more main beliefs.

Confusion, in my opinion, is usually a signal that one or more beliefs are being challenged. This can be a good thing, when the belief being challenged is outdated or simply no longer accurate. In instances like this for example, I have found it helpful to ask targetted questions and to identify the principle belief(s) at play. Is this true for me? Is a powerful question that can offer a feeling of inner relief, clarity as well as inviting in new possibilities.

Affirmations are also a practical first step to retrain our brains and thus breaking a habit of thinking. It was the amazing and inspiring Louise Hay (1927-2017) who first introduced me to affirmations. These are statements that are formulated positively and in the present tense.  At this time in my life, I held the beliefs that I was unlovable, unloved and not good enough. This didn’t feel great at all and I really wanted to feel better about myself. Louise’s work on affirmations helped me learn how to begin to change these limiting beliefs.

I can still remember the wonder and excitement I felt at the time. I knew I was in the presence of what I wanted to hear and believe, even if at first it wasn’t quite yet comfortable. When I first begin affirming, ‘I love myself’ it was really difficult. The words sounded so strange and unfamiliar to me – it actually felt uncomfortable. I liked how saying them and writing them down made me feel about myself though and I kept on with them. Today I use affirmations intentionally to create and generate new and empowering mindset patterns and it helps me to incorporate positive and supportive beliefs that I can think throughout the day. It’s how I remind myself that I am a Conscious Creator co-creating with Life itself.

Our beliefs make us who we are, for the simple reason that we believe them. Herein lies the power and the weakness of beliefs. They can make us weak and strong, empowered and disempowered, believable or a fraud. The critical factor is to remember that although they make us, we can choose and change them. We have and are the power! We just have to believe it and then follow through to make our dreams become true.

Than you so much for reading, much love to you

Trilby xx


Trilby Johnson is an Author, Speaker and Body Energy Alchemist. She supports forward thinking individuals to organically resolve core emotional and physical pain and blocks that may be holding them back from living happy, healthy and successful lives. Find out more at www.trilbyjohnsontheconnective.com

 

 

 

 

 

Believe It – Or Not! By Donna Davis

Article Written By Donna Davis

 

There are 84,600 seconds in a day. That’s a lot of time to plan for failure – or success. Every waking moment is a chance for greatness, purpose and accomplishment…if we so choose. We have and make choices thousands of times a day both consciously and unconsciously.

Our minds are cluttered with old baggage that no longer serves us, and perhaps never did.  All the thoughts of minding someone else’s business, rehearsing conversations, if-onlys and wishful thinking are a big jumbled mess up in that beautiful mind of yours.  Maybe it’s time to tune in to our thoughts and thinking and sort things out a bit.

In order to do that you need to “find” yourself- the self that does all the thinking. Do you have a certain pattern of thoughts?  Do you have a preferred style of thinking? Are you on autopilot and let thinks run amuck-hoping that they will sort themselves out on their own?

Take a look at some choices below and see if any of these categories of thought seem familiar:

Spin Cycle:  The same thoughts, or series of thoughts are stuck on “repeat.”  For some reason your perception is that if you replay the same thoughts over and over again somehow things from the past will change. You think the same thoughts and place them in the “theatre” in your mind. You then take turns trying a new intro, a new outro, going through several wardrobe changes hoping that the outcome will be different. It’s time to shut the machine off, realize that the past cannot be changed or altered in any way, its already done. How do you want to move forward?

Roller Coaster: Woo-whooo what a ride we are on! We often get on this ride-with no seatbelt-and think that when we reach the end of the ride everything will turn out ‘just fine’ because we braved all of the emotions and twists and turns that the ride provides and somehow it will all will be worth it. We find ourselves bruised, battered, bewildered and disappointed. This ‘emotional’ ride has taken its toll on us and we have paid a very high price and often don’t get the outcome that we so desperately needed and believed that this ride would give us. Sometimes we get on the ride willingly, sometimes not. Often times we don’t realize that we have the option to get off. Don’t let this turn into a runaway train! Find the emergency brake! Find some steady ground and choose some better options, step by step.

In The Valley: It is VERY easy to take inventory of your sadness, pain and failures. They seem so BIG!  They are also very heavy and we have allowed them to wear away at our self-esteem, worth and purpose and it has created a large, deep pit where we can go to feel sorry for ourselves any time of day or night. It is a welcoming place and always reminds us of how many mistakes we have made, all the things that went wrong and just how bad everything is.  There is a special place within this canyon called “The Pity Pot” and you are welcome to sit on it 24 hours a day and think about how everything has turned to shit. Your perception of yourself and the world has hit a record low and it is very difficult to get out of this rut!  This place would like you to think that it is impossible to leave and that climbing out of this hole will kill you.  Truth is- you can leave any time you want. You may need some guidance and a helping hand – or two, but it IS absolutely possible to get yourself out of there. It’s time to trade in your real estate for a better future, starting NOW!

Lost In Space    There will always be plenty of information and opinions to suggest perfect outcomes and ideal situations. There are 101 ways to do ‘this,’ and 57 ways to do ‘that!” You want to try all of them, just knowing that you will find 1 that will be extraordinary! But first you have to assimilate ALL the information, with its endless possible scenarios to figure out what that perfect outcome will be before you try and implement anything! There are unlimited ifs, ands & buts. You want to KNOW before you DO anything so it will all be flawless!  It’s time to land. Pick one thing, something and test it out. Through trial, error, and experience, not thinking, you will find what you’ve been searching for.

It’s time to come back to reality. Like it or not, believe it or not, agree with it or not, that is what you need to accept and deal with. Plant your feet firmly on the ground, take a few deep breaths, find your awareness in THIS moment and steer your mind in a forward, positive direction. Create the best YOU and the NOW that could ever possibly BE.

The choice is and always was ours. We may not have realized it, someone could have taken our power away from us or we could have willingly handed it over thinking and hoping that someone else could do better for us than we could do for ourselves. It’s time to wake up, be aware and consciously make better choices.

Much Love,

Donna xx


 

Words Have Power – Written By Jo Cruise

Written By Jo Cruise

A great way to indicate to the Universe what you want in your life is to use positive affirmations. This sets your intention, as the thoughts and words you express are powerful vibrations. These signal to the Universe that you’re ready to receive the abundant blessings of an infinite and Divine cosmos.

When you affirm from a place where your unlimited creative potential resides, you can easily manifest your dreams. Intentions are the pre-cursor to action and they determine the outcome of the energy you create. Really, this is how important affirmations are!

When you’re aligned to your soul purpose you honour this by affirming your true intent. Igniting your passion in life is key to unlocking your individual and unique gifts.
If your life has a common thread running throughout it which has at its centre; joy and love this can be expressed through your inspired creativity. When you light a flame to your passion, you start a chain reaction that fuels all your desires, hopes & dreams. What’s not to love about that!?

Begin each day by setting your intention for that day. The language you use creates the life you live. This is a fundamental aspect of living consciously ~ in the sense of being mindful of your thoughts, words and actions. On waking each morning and as soon as you open your eyes say out loud an affirmation.  Whatever pops into your head and feels right and authentic just say it. Affirm it 10 times, notice how saying these words makes you feel. Do you feel excitement, love or really connected to God/Goddess, Source, the angels or whatever else your belief system is?

Observing how saying this affirmation makes you feel is important, because you need to allow the energy of these words to infuse every cell of your being. Let them soak into your etheric field and feel the vibration of your affirmation lift your spirits for the rest of the day.

I’ve always been captivated by language, of how the formation of words can weave a spell upon our hearts and touch our souls. Since I was a young child words have held a fascination for me. So, in late 1999, I was really interested to hear about Dr. Masaru Emoto, who had researched what the physical impact of words appeared to have on water. In his fascinating book ‘The Hidden Messages of Water’, the late Dr. Emoto conducted studies which he claimed showed how human consciousness affects the structure of frozen water crystals.

In a series of fascinating studies carried out over the next two decades, Dr. Emoto would reveal  water’s physical response to words. He demonstrated how the words used affected the formation of frozen water crystalline structures. The findings concluded that negative words caused the water crystals to form grotesque and ugly shapes, while loving and positive words allowed the crystals to form perfect fractal formations. Considering that humans are made up of approximately 70% water, it’s easy to see how our thoughts and internal dialogue could influence every cell in our body. Knowing this we should all be more mindful of our self-talk and in our day to day verbal interactions with others.

When we take responsibility for the words we use, we create a reality based upon them. How do you intend to live your life? What effect do you want to have on others, on our world? How can your words bring about peace, healing, love and compassion? Use your words wisely, be a ‘conscious conversationalist’.  Let your words flow come from a place of love and gentleness and let your intentions be the catalyst of change as your positive affirmations begin to shape the world in which we are all part of.

 

“Today I surround myself with an abundance of positivity in my life ~ I attract abundant opportunities, helpful situations & people into my life. I’m a magnet for positive possibilities & I hold gratitude in my heart for all the abundant blessings that are in my life”

 

 Much Love,

Jo xx


Jo Cruise Coach and Author

Joanne helps creative and inspired coaches, therapists, healers and spiritual entrepreneurs to gain more clarity, confidence and courage to achieve the success they deserve. She does this through using a unique blend of integrated wellness coaching tools and techniques, that empower her clients to realise the fullest expression of their soul and to birth their inspired ideas into the world.

www.joannecruise.co.uk

www.facebook.com/JoCruise777

www.twitter.com/jo_crui

www.instagram.com/joanne_cruise

 

 

7 Questions to Ask Yourself About Your Relationship Part 7

Q7, Do you and your partner connect intimately?

 

A lot of couples would argue that sex isn’t a big issue in their relationship. This all depends on your own opinion.

Personally, I think it’s a massive issue that both sides should feel full-filled in every aspect of it.

A lot of people have grown up with the influence of their parents telling them that sex is dirty or rude and should only happen in the bedroom with the lights off. …mmm no!.Forget what everyone else has made you believe and decide for yourself what it is that YOU like and YOU want.

If you and your partner have great communication within your relationship, then tell each other your wants and desires. This could completely turn around your life and bring you and your partner so much closer together. Never feel like you have to have sex with somebody to keep them, that’s so wrong!

Communication is the key! And if they are not willing to listen, then they are not worth it.

 

Final Thought….

 

The key to a successful and loving relationship is complete honesty, respect and communication. These three things are vital to keeping the journey of your relationship a happy and full-filling one and it will also make a relationship a pleasure and not a chore.

A lot of people are trapped in relationships that they are completely unhappy with and exist in denial.  The problem truly lies within the foundations of the relationship. I hold my hands up and agree I have been guilty of this in the past myself.

I know also that a lot of you who aren’t happy can’t see a way out and fear that leaving the relationship will mean “going it alone”. YES, it is scary to leave a relationship that you are not happy in and YES it is tough to do so…. BUT, this is only a short process you will go through. This then builds strength into your character and makes you become a stronger person. It also leaves you with the strength that you know you will never tolerate the same treatment in any future relationship you have.

If you are in a controlling or violent relationship, then these are often the hardest to leave and it’s up to yourself to gain the strength to leave that person. It also means letting go of the denial and excuse making that you have told yourself over and over again. I know myself how lonely it can be to be suffering from domestic violence and this is why I write so much on this subject. Not only will it help other people, but it will also help me face the truth of what I went through and finally put it all behind me.

Life is no dress rehearsal and we are only here once. We can’t come back for another shot.  Do yourself a favour and ask yourself,…… what is it that I really want?.

I hope these 7 questions really help you on your journey,

Much Love,

Kate xx

REAL LIFE STORY – Blindsided by Donna Davis

REAL LIFE STORY – Written by Donna Davis

He seemed so very charming. Or was it easy for me to be so distracted because my heart was recently broken in a recent break-up. Misery makes it easy for predators to ease right in. I never saw it coming.

He always had time for me. He smiled a lot and was adventurous. He seemed to know exactly what to say and when. We had fun together and things seemed great. I didn’t know he had a temper and a short fuse.

It started the night that he was teaching me how to drive. I hadn’t had the opportunity before so it seemed wonderful to have the chance to learn.  I started out doing well and then at one point drove off the curb, by accident of course, and watched him turn into a monster. He started yelling and cursing and then hit me. What?!  What’s happening?  I’m sorry it was a mistake! The car is fine. We’re fine. What’s the big deal? He later apologized and I thought it wouldn’t happen again. Unfortunately it did. Over and over again for a ten years. No rhyme or reason. Half the time I couldn’t even figure out what the trigger was. It seemed that I was living in hell.

Prior to being with him I never really knew how painful and destructive anger was. I had never experienced it. If he was angry I would get hit. If he was angry I would get punched. If he was angry I would get raped. If he was angry I would have to listen to hours of yelling and threats while I was cornered in the bathroom.  I didn’t dare question him or answer back and had no idea of how to stand up to him. Year after year it went on and on.  I would subconsciously walk on eggshells afraid of relaxing because he could “blow” at any time. We would have patches of okay existence and even some seemingly happy times and then out of nowhere I would get backhanded in the chest or punched in the head. My belief about anger became:  if someone was angry-especially a man- I was going to get hurt!  It would take me years to have this conscious awareness and several more years before I confronted the fact that this was a lie.

That experience taught me many lessons. It allowed me to see how strong I had become, even after years of feeling so weak and helpless.  I found out what forgiveness was. The surprise-and gift-of that was learning and understanding that forgiveness sets me free. It doesn’t justify what happened or excuse his role in the abuse. It allows me to move on and find peace and live life fully.

The dark memories do come to visit from time to time. I’ve learned how to deal with them.  I acknowledge that they happened and I rejoice that I’ve found a way out. It seems like so long ago now since I was able to put it all behind me.  Each day is a victory, another chance to make better choices for myself and make sure NOONE ever does those things to me again.

I sit here today listening to the Kesha song; “Praying” and smile at the thought that somewhere, somehow, perhaps he has found forgiveness for himself, and maybe has a more peaceful life. That is a wish I can send his way.

I get silent and say a prayer of thanks and ask God what to do next: I hear “Your celebration of life IS your release, IS your reward and IS your freedom.”  I dance in those thoughts with a happy heart, a smile, and a sincere hope that many who find themselves in a similar situation can one day be free as well.  There is a way out.  NEVER give up!

Thank you for reading!

Much Love

Donna xx


About Donna Davis:

As The Menopause Fairy I now help other women fine tune their lives as they discover their “A-HA MOMENTS” and discover happiness and pursue their true purpose. Over the years I have had the honor and privilege of helping women all over the world get clear on their dreams and goals while helping and supporting them as they found their balanced hormonal health and peace. Find out more at: http://themenopausefairy.com/

I Have a Plan For You!

Real Life Story Written By Jaime Evors

 

In 2008, God spoke, “You keep trying to end your life. But I am going to keep intervening because I have a plan for you” as I laid that day in a white hospital bed. Everything in my life that took place up until that point, the sorrows and the victories, swam around in my mind as I tried to make sense of the fact that God himself, had a plan for me.

Soon after that hospitalization, I knew I was to go to Oklahoma for Bible College. Without hesitation, I went. I was newer to faith, and still learning the basics of the Bible. I was excited, vulnerable and naive. I grew by great measure in my faith and in all that God did and does. While attending that college, I met a guy. After being pursued and wooed, we began to date. His family and I would talk on the phone for hours. I dreamed of this family I could have and it was enticing. I was warned by my friends and mentors of these red flags, but my own eyes could not see it. Or simply did not want to. I was slowly drawn away from God. A few months later, I was living across country in the south with his family. When we left the cold winter of Oklahoma and landed in the warmth of the south, I felt sick to my stomach. A part of me knew that I had just gotten myself in to something I wasn’t expecting. But, I wasn’t sure and waited it out. After a few weeks, Christmas came and went, and I knew that I did not want to stay. Something was off. But, I couldn’t quite figure out what exactly. As days turned in to weeks, I began to feel like a puppet. I don’t conform well to other people, so when this began, I had some resistance. They would tell me that what goes on within the family couldn’t go outside their four walls. They controlled who I talked to, what I said, and how acted. I desperately wanted to leave, but was coerced to stay several times by means of being slapped, strangled, thrown onto the ground, and even being put in a shower of cold water during a panic attack. One time in particular, the mother held a butcher knife to her wrists to show what I would cause her to do if I left. I dreaded waking up the next day, every day. I went through psychological, physical, verbal, and sexual abuse during those 8 months. I became so wounded and confused. My past wasn’t one that nurtured what is right and what is wrong, so I naturally thought that it was just me, invaluable me.

But God. I could not deny what He has so kindly spoken to me on that day in 2008. I knew this wasn’t the plan He was referring to. I knew that I needed to flee. With one final attempt, I escaped. I left on a lunch break to never return. I grabbed the few items I could hold and left to head north. As I drove with adrenaline surging, tears streaming, and thoughts racing, I had to keep convincing myself that I was doing the right thing. Everything within me shook and by the next day, I wanted to go back. I panicked. What had I just done? Everything I could have gained, was lost. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was? Maybe it’s all my fault? Maybe it can change? But I knew with my failed attempts to leave before, with my many attempts to keep peace, that things weren’t going to change. I needed to accept that fact to keep myself from returning to the abuse. I kept my shaking hands on the steering wheel and didn’t turn back. So, now what?

Life got harder. Leaving something horrific, doesn’t always mean that it’ll be easier on the other side. I had burned bridges, lost my identity, my faith was shaken, I had flashbacks, nightmares, and continually wanted to go back to them. I no longer knew who I was without them, as horrible as it was. That’s what abuse does. That’s what manipulation and coercion does. It strips us of our identity to the point where we can barely, if at all, think for ourselves. We think that it would be easier to go back, than to work through the pain.

But, I just couldn’t go back. I couldn’t.  However, with the flashbacks, nightmares, and fear that followed me daily, I stopped eating. I tried to starve the feelings and fell silent. I was crippled in fear from threats to not speak of what took place. Even though I had fled, I was still held hostage in my mind. I took sleeping pills, worked full time, and threw up what I did eat. I punished myself. I took the pain out on myself. I would go for morning runs on the country roads of Ohio, and with each sound of my feet hitting the pavement, I told myself how horrible I was, what mistakes I made, how I deserved this pain, and that I was weak. I would tear myself down so no one else could. I told myself whatever it took to in order to push through the pain of malnourishment. I was tormented, yet somehow, I tried again. I made some calls and sent some emails and found a way to get back out to Oklahoma where I had friends and medical facilities that I knew could help restore me. About six months from when I fled from the south, I made the move back out west. Within 2 days, I saw a doctor. I was told that in 2 weeks I would be dead if I didn’t have an intervention, due to Anorexia Nervosa. Part of me thought, “good.” But God’s spirit in me rose up and I knew I needed to do what it takes.

I received the feeding tube, and picked up my shield and fought harder. I felt as though I was in a desert all of this time. I had secrets know one knew of and at the same time needed to rebuild myself, my identity. It took 2 years of choosing every day to keep moving forward. To keep speaking the truth of God’s Word, to keep spending time with Him by being still or praying, and by spending time with good company. I knew He was faithful. From stories in the Bible, from other peoples lives, and even from experiences in my life. There was no question to that. I guess what I didn’t know, was how. How could I get out of this? I didn’t have a vision, I just had to blindly trust Him every day with every thing and keep doing the next right thing. During that 8 months of time down south, I had met someone and we became friends. Over a year later, after talking every day, encouraging one another, he came to live by me to help take care of me while my strength returned as I was to the point of where I was not able to work. We were best friends. Two years later, we decided to court one another and got engaged. Two months later, we were married. Being that he is the only child, after much time and prayer, we decided to move back south. To that same city, the same area where I was maltreated.

As God heals us, He gives us new perspectives. I took it as an opportunity to face the nightmare that I had been running from and trying to suppress and began to finally heal. The very time frame where satan tried to destroy me, a new life was being born out of it.

Doing that next right thing, led me to today. I am happily married to that best friend, who I think is a saint. I have 3 beautiful little children, a quaint home, and even a cat. I am a certified Life Coach and consider it an honor to work with others to take the next step. He’s not finished. God is never finished. He is all of our good qualities and more. He never left me. He helped me through one step at a time. There’s character traits and dreams that I would not have, had it not been for that healing process. I’ve learned not to discount the hard work of healing. It isn’t about getting from point A to point B. If we let that season mold us, we will come out of the fire stronger than before we went in. Our thoughts are fleeting, but His are eternal. He has a plan for you.

Only He could know the depths that phrase would follow me to and bring me out of again. Only He could know what lied ahead. At my deepest sorrow, He spoke life. Thats who He is and that’s what He does. He’s a redeemer.

God bless you,

Jaime xx


Jaime Evors. I am a wife, a mother of 3 and counting. I am certified as a Life Coach through THE AMERICAN SCHOOL OF PROFESSIONAL LIFE COACHING, an ICF accredited program and as well have an associates in Ministry. You can find out more about me at http://www.wavesafterwaves.org/