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GRATITUDE – Written By Doneane Beckcom

This whole summer, since July 4th weekend, has been a downer for me. I have been sick with a chronic sinus infection ever since then, been on way too many rounds of medication, my birthday sucked, my sweet sports car got crunched, I had to have sinus surgery, then Hurricane Harvey decimated my hometown and flooded my house.

Hard to find the gratitude in all of the muck and mire (literally) that has been my life for the past three-plus months, and especially the last 30+ days since we flooded.

I am still living in a home with no flooring, walls torn up at least 2’ from the floor all throughout, some walls totally gutted and ceilings gone, nothing on the walls, and all but the bare essentials packed up and moved into storage. My OCD is in overdrive because of the chaos that is my home.

But it could have been worse. So I am grateful.

While I was sleeping through the storm with my dogs (doped up on pain meds because my sinus surgery was literally the day before it hit), neighbors across the highway from me were fleeing their homes in waist-deep and sometimes neck-deep water. A dear friend called me frantic at 2AM, wanting to know who she should call to rescue her elderly mother, who was now on the 2nd floor of her home and the water was coming up the staircase.

The stories we heard in the next few days were harrowing compared to what we experienced.

The evening that the storm was coming onshore, my husband brought me my rain boots to keep by the bed in the event the water was deeper when we woke up (it was barely coming into the house when I laid down at 11PM). It was over ankle deep when we got up, and stayed that way for over 2 days. While my wood plank flooring floated all over the house, we tried to save what furniture we could. We were moving in slow motion, like zombies in the Apocalypse, not really knowing what to do or where to go, assuming we could even leave our neighborhood.

But it could have been worse.

While we lost a few pieces of furniture and all of our flooring, some neighbors and friends had water up to the rooftop and lost everything. My niece, who is getting married soon, lost her entire house (thank goodness the wedding dress was NOT there). Some people lost their lives.

So after the initial shock of it all started to wane, and I could go a full day without crying hysterically at feeling so overwhelmed with everything (and still feeling horrible from the surgery I was not able to adequately recover from), I had to stop and think.

I am grateful.

I am grateful for the rescues that we watched from our kitchen window, as civilian strangers came and launched their boats from our front yard and got people out of their flooded homes all around us, with just the clothing on their back and their pets.

I am grateful that first responders and military came from all over, leaving their own homes to come and help people here that they do not know. Some of them had flooded homes as well, but felt the call of duty stronger than dealing with their own situations.

I am grateful for my daughter and her fiancé, who dropped everything to come to our house and help us pack up what we could, rip out wet floors and walls, clean up our pool that looked like a lagoon, and worked tirelessly for days to make sure my husband and I were alright. They never complained, never asked for anything, and never listened to us when we said “go home and rest, we are fine.”

I am grateful for all of the mission trips I went on over the last 15 years, helping people who had experienced the same thing I was now going through, helping them sort through their lives, decide what to keep and what to discard, and leaving it all on the curb like trash. Now I know how it feels to be the recipient of that kind of help. And I had often wondered, as I did that work for others, how I would feel if it were me who needed the help. Now I know.

And I am grateful.

I am grateful for the tears that I am shedding as I sit and write this article, knowing that now they are tears of joy and gratitude, and not stress and worry. We are going to be fine. I can cry now knowing that God has truly walked with us through this, and will be by our sides until we are finished rebuilding.

I am grateful because I know that it could have been so much worse.

We could be the people living in the “tent city” in the parking lot of our local Civic Center. But we are living in our home still, even though it is a bit torn up. We are home.

We could be without jobs because our offices flooded or employers shut down and let us go. But we are both still gainfully employed and did not suffer any loss of income because of this event.

We could be homeless. We could be displaced far from our families. But we aren’t.

And I am grateful.

If you are in a time of your life where you are finding it hard to be grateful, be encouraged by this: God spoke to me loud and clear in the depths of my sorrow and helped me to see His hand in this. A friend came over to check on us and as I cried she prayed over me, and quoted the scripture about how God cares for the tiny sparrows, and how He considers us to be of so much more worth than sparrows. When she went to leave and I opened the front door, the largest flock of sparrows I have ever seen was in my front yard, and the door startled them so they took off in a flutter.  I knew without a doubt that God was showing me that He is with us and we will be fine.

And I am grateful.

Thank you for reading,

Doneane Beckcom


Doneane Beckcom
CEO, Bold Radio Station
Certified Fitness Nutrition Specialist
Fitness Nutrition Consulting, LLC

Self-Esteem:- By Kim B. Smith

Self-Esteem:

A confidence and satisfaction in oneself

Self-Respect

1:  A proper respect for oneself as a human being

2:  Regard for one’s own standing or position

 

Webster’s Dictionary definition of self-esteem and self-respect.

Why do we have such a struggle with all of this?

Self-esteem and self-respect are a group of muscles; they must be worked and strengthened every day. In this article, I want to talk about how to do just that, not the reasons why we lack the confidence and satisfaction in ourselves. I will say one more thing, we all experience this and we even have insecurities as well.

The key questions here are:

How long do you stay in this environment of yourself and who do you turn too?

I talk a lot about the ‘Hag in the attic,’ that nagging voice in our heads. You know who she is! The one that keeps you small, comfortable, questioning yourself so your confidence is compromised and satisfaction is never reached. Sound familiar? Believe me, you need support and tools to keep strengthening your self-esteem.

Think about your muscles and you want to become stronger. You need to do a strength-training regime, right? The same goes for your esteem. Esteem needs spiritual training. Yes, spiritual training.

A higher belief of one’s self, call it what you want, The Universe, or God. I believe God created everything, so I speak God. We need this to release all of our lamenting to grow stronger, through chaos, joy, ups, and downs! Think bicep curls, planks, squats and lunges, crunches (all Pilates based of course). Training! Hard core training. Period.

We have twelve laws of the Universe, begin there for your routine. Read them, understand them. You also need water, a dehydrated body leads to misery and that is not the way to strengthen your muscles. Hydration is so key in so many ways.

The bottom line here is when self-doubt creeps in it is a recipe for misery, and you need someone to hand this all over to: God! We think we need other people in our lives to help us through all of this ‘stuff’ we have going on, and we do, however, they have stuff going on as well. There is only one person that can help us grieve, forgive, lament, and give it all too; and that is a higher power is God!

There was a time when I didn’t turn to God, and I felt He was too far away to even help, let alone trust. So here is how I lived:

I chased money, titles and I placed people on pedestals. That left me disappointed, empty, feeling like I was in a deep dark hole, chasing people for love, drugs, and sex. I lied to climb corporate ladders for money and titles. All because I thought this is what society expected of me, and because I didn’t have satisfaction in myself. I didn’t have a family lifting me up, they beat me down. I was on my own since high school navigating my way with little to no tools.

I quit school because it was more fun to go to Florida at spring break and party. I built a career on lies, I cheated people for money, and I did drugs because it was a powerful place to be, or so I thought. I rebelled, believing in my own false confidence. I was wrapped up in my appearance of my body image, so I took on an exercise disorder. I lived a low life because I thought this is what society, and more importantly, my parents thought I should be doing. And yes, these were my judgments, all of this was in my mind.

Anxiety crept in, and it became worse. Physically, I was getting sick. On the outside, it looked like I had it all going on, but the price to pay was my lack of spirituality, faith, self-esteem, and self-respect! I compared myself to others, and I always felt like I had work hard to chase everything down! I would say things like: “I don’t have luck, I don’t come from money, only other people know how to achieve success.” This my friends is the Hag attacking and controlling when you are low.

A few easy suggestions to break this down into simple steps:

 

R.E.A.D.! (I heard this in church.)

 

R: ready in your heart

E: engage the text

A: ask questions

D: decide to act

Read and get to know God’s words, fall in love with Him, then you will be in love with yourself. Take His words and bury them deep into your heart. Slow down to have a conversation with Him. We live in such a fast-paced, surfaced, quick-fix environment. We need to go deeper in our hearts, bury his words so deep nothing can dig them up. Ask the questions of who, what, where, why, and when? Do this daily!

This is the muscle-building regime for developing confidence and satisfaction in oneself, a proper respect for oneself as a human being, and regard for one’s own standing or position!

You now have your foundation of strengthening your self-esteem.

Peace,

Kim xx


Kim Boudreau Smith is a multi-talented CEO and business leader with a legacy of empowering thousands of women. From a corporate background in sales and marketing and over 20 years of experience in the fitness industry, Kim has gone on to become an #1 International Best-Selling Author with the book being one of the best-selling on Amazon for 2015! Kim also has become a multiple International Best-Selling Author Business Consultant and Speaker. Kim combines her expertise with a passion to motivate and inspire other women to become “top producers in their lives”. As CEO of Kim Boudreau Smith Inc. & Founder of Bold Radio Station her international speaking and consulting work has enabled thousands of women to benefit from her inspirational and empowering work. Find out more at www.kimbsmith.com

When Taking The Road to One Dream Becomes Another!

Have you ever took the road to one dream and it becomes another?

Well, here’s what happened in my world in the past 72 hours. As you know, I was all packed and ready to move 200 miles away to a new home and start a new life over. This is because my partner’s work can basically take us anywhere in the UK.

Anyway, back to me all packed and ready to go, so then Matthew receives a phone call to say his next contract is in exactly the same city as before. So, there is me with all my house packed up, nearly all my furniture sold, given away and I am ready to start all over again.

Which basically means we are not going anywhere! And we have to stay for him to work this new contract, which could be for a very long time yet. Well, I stood in the hallway and my chin hit the floor! Why had I been put through this entire motion and what was God trying to teach me by placing me in this experience?

Within the next 24 hour’s it felt like I had been hit around the back of the head with a piece of wood. The clarity of this purpose all became so clear. I thought maybe by sharing this with you could help you on your own journey.

The reason I had been placed through this journey is because I couldn’t see what was right in front of me in the first place. I had so much emotion connections going on with all my previous material stuff that it was clouding my judgement of the present. You would be so surprised how much emotional connections we have with anything material like furniture from our past that maybe an ex-partner bought you, or something that once upon a time you may have borrowed the cash to buy, and the person you borrowed from keeps reminding you every year that if it was not for them 6 years ago you wouldn’t have had “it” in the first place.

When me and my partner of 5 and half years, Matthew, met each other he moved in with me. He moved into my home, with my material stuff, my furniture and everything else was basically mine. The things that I had purchased and accumulated over the years. So, with this, there was so much emotion connected to this stuff over the years and resentment attached to some of it. I couldn’t see clearly what was right in front of me!

So, what WAS right in front of me?

Right in front of me was a house that I can buy at 35% discount of the actual market price. That I could buy, do up beautifully and sell with making a massive profit which would enable me to go buy my dream home 200 miles away from where I was going to move in the first place.

So what was the lesson here?

The lesson was I had to go through the process of thinking I was moving in the first place, have Matthew’s first contract end, give away or sell the majority of my stuff, and go full circle to see what I didn’t see before and to have my eyes awakened to what was right in front of me all along. Why? Because sometimes God moves in ways that sometimes are drastic to make you SEE and to make you LEARN!

You refuse to let the little things cloud your judgement, so he WILL make you see it another way. Sometimes them ways are drastic, but boy! do they work!

48 hours after gaining all this clarity,  I booked a flight to the USA for 3 weeks during the summer time.

Why? Because if I have to place one dream on hold a bit longer because I really couldn’t see the WHY behind it, then am certainly NOT placing my dream of getting married in America off no longer…So it’s  now BOOKED!!! I fly out this year, and marry the love of my life and what’s even more special? My best friend Kim is going to marry us! She is conducting the ceremony.

And the almost empty house? Is now getting a makeover with new furniture and going to be our first house project and first step up on the property ladder as property developers like we had planned many years ago to do. This whole learning experience more than makes up for having to scramble through boxes to find stuff.

How about that for setting out on a road to a dream and then resulting in a completely different one?

You couldn’t make this journey up if you tried!

Have a beautiful Tuesday morning, and see you on Facebook live tomorrow!

Until then, I have unpacking to do 🙂

Much love & appreciation

Kate xx

 

 

Are You Working With a Divided Heart?

Are you working with a divided heart?

A divided heart is where your heart is just not in your work because you allow doubt, fear and other things test your faith. When we let the doubt win, we lose overall.

We lose that dream that we visioned to make real and we never progress in making it happen. So, really, we are working with a divided heart and mind. We let the darkness win and we go back into our comfort zone where it’s extremely cosy and think it was a stupid idea to have thought we could achieve what we had in mind.

Guess what? There is no cosy place in the big wide world of living out your dreams! If you are not shaking in your boots with every goal you set, then you are not growing, period. You are not stretching yourself to see what you are truly capable of and you never will as long as you keep that divided heart. As long as you keep letting in that doubt, fear and going back to that place of comfort the devil is laughing at you.

Now, if you are a person who is strong willed and knows that no matter what it will happen and chooses to walk by faith and not by sight every single day towards your dreams with the full expectancy of knowing that you will have to walk through storms, that you will have to be prepared and willing to work from a place of excellence, and that you will need to cut all excuses (well-planned lies) from your journey. Take full responsibility and face whatever comes your way with a full heart of love and understanding that this journey was written for you.

Do you think your results may be different?

Of course, it would! I see far too many business owners working their selves to exhaustion because they choose (notice how I said choose) to work with a divided heart and not stay focused on the vision in their mind. We each have truly amazing natural God-given gifts that we choose not to use, completely ignore the vision in our minds and go down the completely wrong track and providing services that drain us and end up letting the doubt take over and take us away from where our true purpose lies.

If you just slowed down for a moment and stopped trying to be Jack of all trades and master of none, you would actually start to see that vision in your mind of what you were actually created for, to begin with. Then when you start to take action towards that vision and place huge focus upon it (nothing else) it then starts to come alive and take on a whole new life of its own.

And why does it start to come alive and take on a whole new life of its own? This is because you started to walk by faith and not by sight. You let go of all fears and said: “I am going for this in every fibre of my being, no matter what!”.

You stopped letting the darkness win and outshone it with the light that came from your heart and soul. Which is so bright it actually dissolves all negative thoughts, doubt and fear and the devil shuts up and goes to toy with somebody else who is living with a divided heart and soul instead.

If you work with a divided heart, you are not the only one who suffers. The people who’s lives you were supposed to touch for the reason and purpose you were created also miss out.

Let go of that doubt, let the light win, and go for it with all your might!

I DARE YOU!

Have a wonderful Valentines Day,

Much Love

Kate xxx

Do The Complete Opposite

Whatever everybody else is doing right now, does not mean you have to follow them. We can easily become caught up in shiny object syndrome and think because somebody else is doing something, then we automatically need to do the same.  As an online business owner, you may hear many times “You should be doing webinars” or “You should be doing download programs”. “Why are you not offering this service, that service and every other service to go with it?”.

Then before you know it you are having a meltdown, pulling your hair out and frustrated to high heaven and hating the pressure you have to live through each day to try and place something together that is not even the slightest bit pleasurable to you. You are only doing it because the rest of the crowd is doing it and you feel like you have to live up to that expectation.

Well, guess what? It’s complete bullshit! You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. The only place you should be working from is a place that excites you the most and that place is usually in the complete opposite of what everybody else is doing. The only thing that matters on this journey is what YOU love doing! Not what your neighbour is doing, or your best friend, or a large community  that you are maybe a part of on Facebook.

See here’s the thing,

When I set out in the online industry I didn’t have somebody like me back then to come up to me and tell me this advice. So, I went into the world where I was completely swallowed up by the belief that what everybody else is doing, is what I should be doing, right?. Mmmm big fat WRONG!  It led me to frustration, stress, pulling my hair out, attracting clients that had every excuse not to pay me and I was down right miserable.

What was it here that I was doing so wrong? I was following the crowd that’s what and not doing what pleased me! What made my heart sing and what lit up my soul so it was dancing inside. I was doing everything else to please other people and I was not pleasing myself. I was frustrated, sick all the time and started to hate what I was doing.

One day I sat down and said to myself “What can I do right now to please me?” not the world, not my clients, just me? What is it that I truly want to do? I knew I loved to write, create things and help people feel the best they could ever feel in their lives. Then I asked the question “Where do I feel pressured the most?” which then lead me to reel off a complete list of what I DIDNT want to do.

I didn’t want to do webinars, summits, download programs, and everything the crowd was doing. I just wanted to write, coach and create. So that’s what I did and I forgot the rest. My heart started to sing again and the things I was creating in the world were just astounding.

smallerI started to create a book series called The Missing Piece, which became an international best-selling book series with 10 books strong. I then went on to help other clients create their books and even went as far as flying to San Diego to host a retreat for 10 women and place together a calendar. After much success with my books, my client’s books and the calendar I started to feel a familiar feeling surface again. It was that feeling of wanting to change direction and do something new and exciting to make my heart and soul dance again.

I had become accustomed to doing the same thing over and over again and what others wanted me to do and not what I wanted to do for myself. So I began to get sick again and the same pattern started to repeat itself. At this moment in time I was running a multi-six figure business, but unhappy at the same time.

Money means shit if you have to nearly kill yourself to earn it! Towards the end of 2015, one of my business partners and close friends stabbed me in the back which completely made me bed ridden with illness and I went from running 9 miles 3 times a week to not even being able to climb the stairs without nearly passing out when I reached the top. I couldn’t believe what had happened to me and I felt so betrayed, let down and completely shattered.

In that moment I decided to take 5 months out and really get clear on what I wanted to do. I didn’t care that I was walking away from over $2,500-week income, my sanity was worth a million times more than that. In that 5 months, I placed myself into life coaching, spiritual coaching and spent the time deciding what I really wanted?

What was it that I wanted for me? Again I had come back around to answering this question 4 years later. I went to bed that evening still trying to search for the answers and something happened the very next morning that would totally change the course of my entire business, life journey and entire outcome. It brought me back to the answers like before that I love to write, create and teach.

I also had an image in my mind of an interactive online magazine that I could clearly see. I sat down at my kitchen table that morning and completely wrote out the design aspect, what would be in it and who would write for it and how it would look, read, feel to the customer, and who would buy it etc….

Right there and then I had written out a complete business model that would completely change the way I did everything. Now let’s bear in mind, that I have NEVER created a magazine before, or have any clue about graphic design or where the heck this idea came from. I had just let my mind unleash itself because I was doing what pleased me and going in completely opposite direction of what was expected of me. I was acting on God’s vision alone.

MARKETING SAMPLE

After I had written out the complete magazine business model, I went forward and took action on my ideas. I sat there for hours learning design, how to brand this like no other magazine and how to do it completely different to the masses. In a matter of a few months I was creating beautiful pages (like you see above) I had a complete writing team of world re-nowed coaches, and I secured multi-millionaires, billionaires and other major successful business owners for the front covers and exclusive interviews.

It all came to life because I did what made me happy! I walked away from what didn’t serve me anymore and I can say I am the happiest I have ever been in my life. Me and my partner are now building a 2nd a business to which the earning potential is limitless and takes very little work each day. I am now coaching people to become great publishers instead of being the publisher myself, and the magazine is going strength to strength and will be launched on January 17th, 2017.

I learned that out of pain comes amazing things and my painful experience last year was the beginning of something wonderful. It was also an even bigger lesson to go in the opposite direction to the crowd.

Until next time

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Much Love & Zero Bullshit

Kate xx