The past 7 days have been really extreme for me to say the least! You know when you have them moments of “Oh my gosh! Look how far I have come” moments?
Well, that was me this week. I watched a real life drama that told the story of a young woman who was beaten to death by her boyfriend while her 3-year-old daughter watched. This really placed me back to where I was 7 years ago, and how freaking LUCKY I am to be alive today!
I was in an abusive relationship in my early 30’s, which nearly cost me my life. The stress of that relationship caused me to develop anxiety disorder, which resulted from me in having huge panic attacks—one panic attack resulted in a stroke, which paralysed the right side of my body for two months afterwards. So to sit there and watch another person’s story and the fact she never made it out alive was EXTREME! I had a moment where I was shocked that I had come this far and was still alive.
Watching another person’s story took me back to the times when my ex would come home from the pub and sit at the end of my bed for two hours and give me of verbal torture, then he would then fall asleep into a beer coma next to me until morning. There were many times when I woke up in the morning wet through because he had wet the bed at the side of me. He would drink so much that he wouldn’t even get up to go to the bathroom, and just lay there and peed himself instead. One evening, when I suggested that he should slow down with his drinking because I was afraid he may have a drinking problem, he launched across the room and grabbed me by the neck and pushed my back up against the wall. He started squeezing my throat tighter and tighter and I panicked, thinking he was going to kill me. Finally, he slackened his grip and I fell to the floor, gasping for breath.
The ladies story took me back to my own, and the next morning I cried my eyes out. Not because I was upset, or because my life is bad in any way. I cried with massive appreciation in my heart that I now live with one amazing, loving man who will be my husband in only 10 weeks time. That I have a business that I love and a family that is so beautiful and precious in every way. I cried because I had completely changed my life around from the life I had only 7 and the half years ago!
I cried because I am so lucky compared to so many people in relationships who aren’t so lucky. The ones that don’t make it to even write a blog like this to share with you because their partner took their life. Having this huge awakening this week completely knocked me for six and I had to take time out for me to process all of this. Plus, yet another terrible incident happening in London this week where a whole tower block of people lost their homes, lost their loved ones and had to stand there and watch everything their own go up in flames.
All this and starting my new college course in addiction counselling and starting with my new coach was so much to take in and process all in one week. So when there is a lot to process it only means one thing for me. Take 5, process it all, recharge and then come back ready to face the world like a lion once more. If you don’t give yourself process time then your brain will overload and you could end up completely drained.
We always have to remember we are only human and breakthroughs, learning and situations in the world can have a massive impact upon you. And that’s ok, but just be honest with yourself and notice when you do need to process, and respect yourself enough time to allow that process to happen.
If I was to pretend to you that shit never happened to me, or that I didn’t need time to process all that has hit me in one week, wouldn’t I be really bullshitting you? I would be setting a fake stage by saying “Growth is easy” … Mmmmm no it isn’t! It’s far from freaking easy, and your followers will appreciate you so much more if you actually admit it!
So this is my confession list to you today:
- I cried this week because I am lucky to have all abusive relationships behind me and be still alive.
I have a new and amazing coach and she taught me more in one week than I learnt in 2 years!
The London tower fire made my heart heavy for those who have lost everything.
I am a college student working towards a Diploma in Addiction coaching and loving it!
I brought Matthew (future husband) to tears with his father’s day gift.
I am a human being and needed the time out yesterday to process everything from this week.
I am really really really appreciative of my life and YOU.
It’s been one heck of a journey to get here today, but I wouldn’t change any part of it. I will continue on this journey of growing The Missing Piece Magazine so that people like myself on a growth journey can have access to a powerful tool for FREE! So that they have to hand everything they need to work through them moments of processing. So they too don’t feel completely blinded by all the “perfection” that is placed before them in the world.
It can be so easy to follow somebody who makes it all look easy, who really does not tell you half of what they actually go through behind the scenes and to me that’s just complete rubbish and setting a fake high standard that you will never in a million years reach, or die trying. Growth is far from easy, it’s just freaking worth it!
This journey is never about how far you have yet to go, it’s about how far you have come already. Every other day from here on is just another bonus of you going further. As we go into the weekend take time for yourself and your own processing of this week. Tomorrow is the release of issue 6 of The Missing Piece Magazine and in this month’s issue, we are looking at The Laws of the Universe. what are they? Who wrote them? What are they all about? Do they work? and so much more will be answered inside with powerful articles and interactive video articles.
This is your chance to process some of the powerful knowledge in this month’s issue from all our 30 coaches and Plus an Exclusive Interview with our cover guy Mark Baker and so much more. Place your name and email address in the sign-up box below and issue 6 will be delivered straight to your inbox tomorrow.
So, until next time have a wonderful weekend and make this day your best day yet!